Stewart Compares Level of Chuck Schumer’s Glasses to Dem Polling: ‘If You Keep this Up, You’ll Be Wearing this on Your D*ck’

STEWART Because Senator Schumer ░░░░░░░░ remind the people what ░░░░░░░░ necessary Clip starts Schumer ░░░░░░░░ do not have the ░░░░░░░░ in the Senate Clip ░░░░░░░░ STEWART You don t ░░░░░░░░ the votes You need ░░░░░░░░ approval cause you don ░░░░░░░░ have the votes Because ░░░░░░░░ filibuster requires I only ░░░░░░░░ the play once Laughter ░░░░░░░░ see Republicans your little ░░░░░░░░ budget plan might have ░░░░░░░░ if you hadn t ░░░░░░░░ that one Senator Schumer ░░░░░░░░ Charles in charge of ░░░░░░░░ Democratic Party I m ░░░░░░░░ your diabolical scheme has ░░░░░░░░ foiled Clip starts RADDATZ ░░░░░░░░ Democratic leader Chuck Schumer ░░░░░░░░ off a firestorm heading ░░░░░░░░ this weekend when he ░░░░░░░░ course and announced he ░░░░░░░░ vote to move forward ░░░░░░░░ a Republican backed funding ░░░░░░░░ Clip ends Audience boos ░░░░░░░░ Turns out you had ░░░░░░░░ votes Republicans had the ░░░░░░░░ What the bleep happened ░░░░░░░░ starts Schumer I will ░░░░░░░░ to keep the government ░░░░░░░░ I believe it is ░░░░░░░░ job to make the ░░░░░░░░ choice for the country ░░░░░░░░ minimize the harms to ░░░░░░░░ American people Clip ends ░░░░░░░░ But but you had ░░░░░░░░ it was terrible and ░░░░░░░░ wait a minute Oh ░░░░░░░░ I know what s ░░░░░░░░ on here All right ░░░░░░░░ know what s going ░░░░░░░░ here You got me ░░░░░░░░ Chucky You probably got ░░░░░░░░ little something out of ░░░░░░░░ didn t you ol ░░░░░░░░ Shoo You wouldn t ░░░░░░░░ given up that powerful ░░░░░░░░ on the budget for ░░░░░░░░ My guess is Chucky ░░░░░░░░ some cheese Clip starts ░░░░░░░░ Did Schumer get anything ░░░░░░░░ Republicans in exchange for ░░░░░░░░ Dem votes UNKNOWN He ░░░░░░░░ not Clip ends STEWART ░░░░░░░░ Schumer no disrespect but ░░░░░░░░ are a disgrace to ░░░░░░░░ stereotypes about financial negotiations ░░░░░░░░ and Applause That is ░░░░░░░░ the whole point of ░░░░░░░░ is that s what ░░░░░░░░ do But you are ░░░░░░░░ there How much is ░░░░░░░░ 5 How about I ░░░░░░░░ you 7 Why What ░░░░░░░░ you doing And for ░░░░░░░░ of you who may ░░░░░░░░ felt it was a ░░░░░░░░ capitulation Senator Schumer just ░░░░░░░░ like this wasn t ░░░░░░░░ moment for Democrats to ░░░░░░░░ their case because Trump ░░░░░░░░ still too strong Clip ░░░░░░░░ Schumer When he went ░░░░░░░░ 40 in the polls ░░░░░░░░ Republican legislator started working ░░░░░░░░ us He was at ░░░░░░░░ He s now 48 ░░░░░░░░ re going to keep ░░░░░░░░ it keep at it ░░░░░░░░ at it until he ░░░░░░░░ below 40 When it ░░░░░░░░ I am hopeful that ░░░░░░░░ Republican colleagues will resume ░░░░░░░░ with us Clip ends ░░░░░░░░ You re going to ░░░░░░░░ at it keep at ░░░░░░░░ keep at it keep ░░░░░░░░ it At what This ░░░░░░░░ it This was the ░░░░░░░░ that you would have ░░░░░░░░ keeping at The keeping ░░░░░░░░ the it It s ░░░░░░░░ the keeping of the ░░░░░░░░ that s the issue ░░░░░░░░ s what the it ░░░░░░░░ t you have to ░░░░░░░░ it to keep at ░░░░░░░░ If this wasn t ░░░░░░░░ then what it Cheering ░░░░░░░░ Applause What is it ░░░░░░░░ this not be it ░░░░░░░░ apparently the grand plan ░░░░░░░░ Dems keep fecklessly complaining ░░░░░░░░ the 48 approval comes ░░░░░░░░ to 40 which is ░░░░░░░░ plan But it s ░░░░░░░░ one crucial piece of ░░░░░░░░ in Schumer s popularity ░░░░░░░░ Clip starts CABRERA Devastating ░░░░░░░░ poll numbers for Democrats ░░░░░░░░ 27 of voters have ░░░░░░░░ positive view of the ░░░░░░░░ It s the lowest ░░░░░░░░ rating in the history ░░░░░░░░ NBC s polling Clip ░░░░░░░░ STEWART You re at ░░░░░░░░ You ve got to ░░░░░░░░ Trump to lose eight ░░░░░░░░ of popularity just for ░░░░░░░░ to get to the ░░░░░░░░ where you re 13 ░░░░░░░░ below him Your approval ░░░░░░░░ only seven points above ░░░░░░░░ it turns red and ░░░░░░░░ into low power mode ░░░░░░░░ you re not a ░░░░░░░░ learner Maybe a visual ░░░░░░░░ of where you re ░░░░░░░░ Let me meet you ░░░░░░░░ you bleep live All ░░░░░░░░ Here we go Cheering ░░░░░░░░ Applause Let me do ░░░░░░░░ This is 48 approval ░░░░░░░░ is them This is ░░░░░░░░ This is you 27 ░░░░░░░░ is them Oh I ░░░░░░░░ they are much higher ░░░░░░░░ they are much higher ░░░░░░░░ if you keep this ░░░░░░░░ you will be wearing ░░░░░░░░ on your d ck ░░░░░░░░ you understand Jesus Cheering ░░░░░░░░ Applause Perhaps I m ░░░░░░░░ too hard on the ░░░░░░░░ Although I m not ░░░░░░░░ he has insider knowledge ░░░░░░░░ a quiet smoldering Republican ░░░░░░░░ to compromise.”