Licensed Psychologist Kelli Rugless: ‘You Want to Avoid Politics’ if You Want to Have a ‘Chill, Relax Holiday’

ROMO Well tis the ░░░░░░░░ to gather with family ░░░░░░░░ friends for holiday dinners ░░░░░░░░ parties Maybe doing that ░░░░░░░░ now And that means ░░░░░░░░ could be faced with ░░░░░░░░ maybe uncomfortable conversations from ░░░░░░░░ to questions about your ░░░░░░░░ life and even that ░░░░░░░░ advice All of this ░░░░░░░░ be a challenge to ░░░░░░░░ but we have some ░░░░░░░░ Licensed psychologist R Kelli ░░░░░░░░ is here to help ░░░░░░░░ out Dr Rugless thanks ░░░░░░░░ being here Happy Thanksgiving ░░░░░░░░ should we just try ░░░░░░░░ make some conversation topics ░░░░░░░░ limits during these holiday ░░░░░░░░ What should we try ░░░░░░░░ avoid and what s ░░░░░░░░ okay RUGLESS Yeah So ░░░░░░░░ think you know just ░░░░░░░░ therapist brain wants to ░░░░░░░░ sure that folks know ░░░░░░░░ conflict isn t always ░░░░░░░░ terrible thing Sometimes it ░░░░░░░░ absolutely build stronger relationships ░░░░░░░░ if you really don ░░░░░░░░ have the bandwidth and ░░░░░░░░ re looking for a ░░░░░░░░ chill relax holiday then ░░░░░░░░ there are definitely some ░░░░░░░░ that you want to ░░░░░░░░ You want to avoid ░░░░░░░░ you want to avoid ░░░░░░░░ religion any deep seated ░░░░░░░░ disputes that haven t ░░░░░░░░ addressed and deeply personal ░░░░░░░░ like is somebody getting ░░░░░░░░ Are they having kids ░░░░░░░░ s their what are ░░░░░░░░ currently doing in their ░░░░░░░░ Those kinds of topics ░░░░░░░░ really sensitive and can ░░░░░░░░ lead to disagreements ROMO ░░░░░░░░ yes they can I ░░░░░░░░ speaking from personal experience ░░░░░░░░ what do we do ░░░░░░░░ Rugless if the conversation ░░░░░░░░ does veer off into ░░░░░░░░ of these topics that ░░░░░░░░ re just really uncomfortable ░░░░░░░░ what can we do ░░░░░░░░ You can redirect So ░░░░░░░░ is really just about ░░░░░░░░ the brain do two ░░░░░░░░ unrelated things that it ░░░░░░░░ not used to doing ░░░░░░░░ you can redirect them ░░░░░░░░ that sensitive topic into ░░░░░░░░ neutral things like movies ░░░░░░░░ books or travel or ░░░░░░░░ traditions that bring warm ░░░░░░░░ feelings and open ended ░░░░░░░░ like hey what are ░░░░░░░░ plans for the year ░░░░░░░░ up And to do ░░░░░░░░ things you can also ░░░░░░░░ your sense of humor ░░░░░░░░ You can ask really ░░░░░░░░ and white questions that ░░░░░░░░ yes or no answers ░░░░░░░░ it s really hard ░░░░░░░░ feel intensely angry and ░░░░░░░░ when you re laughing ░░░░░░░░ when somebody is asking ░░░░░░░░ a yes or no ░░░░░░░░ ROMO That is great ░░░░░░░░ Laughter is that best ░░░░░░░░