COLBERT: "Son of a bishop! The pope is a socialist! I mean, in retrospect, I should have known. He lives in Europe and he gives his employees a one-day work week. He can't do this. Because either the pope is wrong or god's a commie. Wait a second-- come to think of it, he does look an awful lot like Karl Marx. Plus, Jesus was a carpenter. That's why he holds a hammer. But, Jimmy, what's in his other hand? A sickle! No! No, no, no. I refuse. This cannot be right. I mean, where is it written they can't love both god and money? I mean, besides in Matthew where Jesus says you can't serve god and money. I guess I'm going to have to choose, money or Jesus. I guess I'll flip a coin. There you have it. It came up money."