Colbert: Trump Should’ve Done the Military Parade at the Inaugural to Fill out the Empty Seats

RUSH TRANSCRIPT:
COLBERT: "You know, here’s the thing, here’s the thing— we kid the president. But you’ve got to admit, he’s one of a kind. No one comes up with dumber ideas. And at this point, he’s his own competition. He’s the usain bolt of stupid. And his latest record-breaking dumb: Trump told the Pentagon to plan a military parade. All right, check your cards: Who has dictator bingo? Yeah. There you go. I got— I got it. I’m close, I’m close. I was close. I had rallies and attack the free press. I didn’t have military parade. Anyway, so, trump’s not mad at kikim Jong-un so much as he seems to be jealous. He wants to do all the fun stuff. I can’t wait for trump to visit to the lube factory. That’s how much Eric puts on his hair. But here’s the thing: Traditionally, America doesn’t do military parades. Normally, if you’re in a U.S. City with tanks rolling down the road, I wouldn’t bring the children. When you’re the most powerful military in the world, you don’t need to show it off. We know we got a big joint. The founding fathers didn’t upon a stabbed standing army at all, and military parades were a European fetish, and not the kind Benjamin Franklin got off on."